March 6, 2007

• Tuesday

  Well something wierd happened today.

  I did have the infusion.

  But partway through, the only pastor from our old church that I still have any sort of relationship with, came in.  I said, "DALLAS!"  And he came over to me for a hug. He told me that he had been really praying for me.  I asked what he was doing there, and he told me that they had found a large, malignant, inoperable tumor in his brain.  His daughter and granddaughter were both there.  He introduced me to both of them.  He was going to meet with Dr. H.   He went to the room to see Dr. H, and his granddaughter lagged behind.  I asked her what was going on, and she told me that they were giving him very little time.  That they were doing radiation simply to buy some time.

  I cried.  A lot.  I hate this disease.  Just really really hate it.

  When Dallas came out of the room, he came back over to hug me.  I told him that we were blessed, because for us "to live is Christ, and to die is truly gain."  He agreed with me.  But told me that I had better win my battle since he wasn't going to be able to win his.

  30 minutes later... the receptionist came back and asked if the S. family had left.  I told them that yes, they had.  She left.  She came back and asked if I knew Matt Herd.  Um... yeah... he's the senior pastor who was the reason we left our last church.  I guess he was supposed to meet Dallas there to pray, and he was late.  He asked if he could come speak to me to see if I knew where they had gone. 

  Of course, I had to introduce myself.  He didn't know me.  But he said that he recognized my face.  I told him that we didn't go to his church anymore, but we had for a long time, so it would make sense that he recognized me.  I told him where he might find Dallas and his family.

  Now, I was sitting in the chemo room with IVs attached.  He asked how I was doing.  I told him that I was taking one day at a time, but that I was doing pretty well right now.  He said that he was going to pray for me while he was looking for Dallas.

  Now, I have to admit that I've wanted to have the opportunity to talk to that man for more than 2 years.  And if you ask me if I believe he really did pray for me, I will tell you "no."  I was just completely bumfuzzled by his presence.  I know that it wasn't the time or place to say what I've wanted to say to him.  And that moment was about Dallas. I just wish I knew what God was trying to tell me.  Matt Herd.  I had a conversation with Matt Herd.  Good golly.

  I was so flustered by that visit that I ODed on my lunchtime pills.  I take 3 oxycontin in the morning, 3 at night, and ONE at lunchtime.  I took 3.  And I've been shaky all night.  Oh well.  I told one of the nurses right away, and she said I'd be fine.

  But the iron seems to have helped.  I do have more energy.  YAY!

  • 11:30 pm
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